keeping the faith

I have been wanting to share about my faith for a while, but just have not had the time to. Keeping in mind what Raymond said about how faith not shared will lead to its death, I shall try my best to share especially when I have the luxury to type away tonight.

One of the reasons why I feel distant from God is that I do not keep him in my life everyday. Daily prayer is so important but I fail to be constant in it. Going for confession on novena last saturday really made me wake up. Instead of saying what my penance was, the priest asked directly, "Do you say your prayers daily?" And all I could say was a sheepish "I try to...". :p

I liken it to a relationship. With Jacques, I have to call or sms him everyday. This communication lets us know of how we feel, how our day has been, what's been bothering us. How can I say that I have no time for God? I felt really guilty thinking about it. Turning my back on the one who cares the most and shrugging Him off by saying I'm busy. Go save the world. Leave me alone. Or let me save myself.

Maybe it's the devil as well as my busy research life. But in the end, I know I have to come back to God, to find that peace within and to come back to the place where I truly belong. I know it's much easier for us to say it's impossible, it's difficult, we can't do it. But it's not a journey for us to go through on our own. It's one where Jesus walks with us, carries us and walks ahead of us. To believe and keep the faith is really something that we cannot boast about ourselves but to give back the praise to God. How easy it is in the world, to follow the idea that God is redundant and far away. To close our doors to the church for its backward and old fashioned ways. It is a struggle for me, especially when I face issues on sexuality, other religions, evolution, use of contraceptives... I end up questioning .. Is this really the true way?

Recently I have been trying to pick up daily prayer in my life. I'm taking slow and small steps. I set aside 15 mins to pray before I left the house one day, and God spoke to me through an article found the 'The Word Amongst Us'.

Just to quote:

It is Possible! All of us who have been baptized are set free from sin and filled with divine life. But without our daily decision to seek the Lord and to take hold of what we have received in baptism, this new life will remain either as a seed or as a fragile sapling. Only by making daily decisions to turn our lives to Jesus will we experience the grace and power that Gid has so generously given us in this sacrament of baptism.


It all ties in nicely doesn't it? What is blocking us from God? Most of the time we are the ones who keep Him at bay. Why? Why oh why especially when He loves us more than our fears or sins.